Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.

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  (586): If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete. http://tfl.nu/258x
  Replies (8) Good night (1992) Bad night (698) Order T-Shirt
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.

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  (630): You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude. http://tfl.nu/zi0k
  Replies (16) Good night (950) Bad night (3956)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?

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  (617): I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks? http://tfl.nu/26q7
  Replies (55) Good night (2030) Bad night (6462) Order T-Shirt
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.

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  (586): She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her. http://tfl.nu/fg6t
  Replies (13) Good night (6540) Bad night (1445) Order T-Shirt
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night

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  (609): id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night http://tfl.nu/kxc6
  Replies (11) Good night (3486) Bad night (839) Order T-Shirt
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you

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  (248): Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you http://tfl.nu/8prb
  Replies (7) Good night (1078) Bad night (2659) Order T-Shirt
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.

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  (717): Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome. http://tfl.nu/70l7
  Replies (10) Good night (4703) Bad night (751) Order T-Shirt
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.

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  (604): I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power. http://tfl.nu/ot62
  Replies (4) Good night (1492) Bad night (794) Order T-Shirt
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet

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  (480): We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet http://tfl.nu/q54w
  Replies (5) Good night (1502) Bad night (419) Order T-Shirt
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  (207): View more from Maine

  someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?

  (1-207): View more from Maine

  since 2006

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  (207): someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship? (1-207): since 2006 http://tfl.nu/9t6c
  Replies (7) Good night (2089) Bad night (452) Order T-Shirt
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?

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  (314): New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there? http://tfl.nu/271n
  Replies (4) Good night (1506) Bad night (380) Order T-Shirt
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party

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  (617): She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party http://tfl.nu/crsc
  Replies (5) Good night (1653) Bad night (288) Order T-Shirt
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  (850): View more from Florida

  Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?

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  (850): Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans? http://tfl.nu/94rr
  Replies (1) Good night (240) Bad night (397) Order T-Shirt
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  (925): View more from California

  I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.

  (480): View more from Arizona

  I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.

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  (925): I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist. (480): I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test. http://tfl.nu/pge5
  Replies (2) Good night (923) Bad night (303)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom

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  (301): Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom http://tfl.nu/wuli
  Replies (11) Good night (2284) Bad night (386)

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