They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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