So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize