he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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