David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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