I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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