If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
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