Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Randomize