Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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