He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
I think my fart just growled at me.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Randomize