wanna go halves on a baby?
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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