Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Randomize