I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Randomize