How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize