I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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