But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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