I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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