Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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