Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize