Who did Billy Mays play for?
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize