I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
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