4 words: hood of his car
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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