i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
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i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
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I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
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