I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize