Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
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