I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
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