He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
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I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
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Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
be right there i have to get my cape
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
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