Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
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