Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize