im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize