Texts From Last Night

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  (906): View more from Michigan

  so... i had sex tonight

  (906): View more from Michigan

  with a midget

  (906): View more from Michigan

  nicccce tits for a little person

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  (906): so... i had sex tonight (906): with a midget (906): nicccce tits for a little person http://tfl.nu/2uyc
  Replies (1) Good night (1250) Bad night (561)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.

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  (210): I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day. http://tfl.nu/nvhr
  Replies (53) Good night (3507) Bad night (964) Order T-Shirt
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.

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  (706): Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully. http://tfl.nu/qn1h
  Replies (119) Good night (12201) Bad night (986) Order T-Shirt
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  (214): View more from Texas

  new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.

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  (214): new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5. http://tfl.nu/1dnu
  Replies (22) Good night (9276) Bad night (976) Order T-Shirt
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  (916): View more from California

  WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.

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  (916): WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN. http://tfl.nu/3mw6
  Replies (8) Good night (3252) Bad night (706) Order T-Shirt
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.

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  (720): I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team. http://tfl.nu/53x1
  Replies (11) Good night (3010) Bad night (819) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.

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  (516): You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food. http://tfl.nu/5019
  Replies (20) Good night (3289) Bad night (810) Order T-Shirt
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.

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  (217): We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater. http://tfl.nu/r45m
  Replies (4) Good night (1542) Bad night (533) Order T-Shirt
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.

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  (703): I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks. http://tfl.nu/40kn
  Replies (3) Good night (1522) Bad night (422)
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  (607): View more from New York

  Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.

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  (607): Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage. http://tfl.nu/h8mr
  Replies (3) Good night (850) Bad night (367) Order T-Shirt
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.

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  (208): Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success. http://tfl.nu/sluv
  Replies (1) Good night (1044) Bad night (277) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind

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  (303): I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind http://tfl.nu/1u44
  Replies (15) Good night (3466) Bad night (373) Order T-Shirt
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  (903): View more from Texas

  Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.

  (936): View more from Texas

  You are the coolest girlfriend ever.

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  (903): Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us. (936): You are the coolest girlfriend ever. http://tfl.nu/hjex
  Replies (4) Good night (1484) Bad night (230)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.

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  (780): I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started. http://tfl.nu/6whx
  Replies (0) Good night (579) Bad night (159) Order T-Shirt
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave

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  (814): I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave http://tfl.nu/mtmf
  Replies (5) Good night (254) Bad night (735) Order T-Shirt

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