idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
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