4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Randomize