made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
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