Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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