Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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