My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
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