How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
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so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
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Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
why is half of my head shaved?
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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