dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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