Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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