Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
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