I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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