Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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