Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
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