sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize