I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
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