Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
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