Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
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