my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
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i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
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WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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