therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
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They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
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